So yesterday I decided to walk home from work. Something I haven’t done in a very long time. I must admit it was tough walking 5 miles in the sun, but It felt great and sort of like an accomplishment. A race with no prize at the end, nor a crowd applauding me, just bragging rights i guess…

All I had was $2.52 in my pocket. I thought I could probably jump on the bus and get home sooner, but the bus took forever. By the time the bus drove by I had been walking 3.5 miles already. By then I decided to just keep strolling along. As I walked I started thinking…There are people out there who will walk for miles with no destination, no home, no money, and possibly  no family to get to. I thought to myself, this is probably what homeless people feel like. I can’t imagine a life with no destination… I looked around and begin to notice everything. Something I don’t do much when I drive thru this part of town. I began to waive at random old folks sitting infront of their homes, their tire shops and abandoned lots. I wondered what their everyday life was like. I saw Random BBQ joints, tons of churches and car dealers I’d probably never do business with. I ran into a few junk yard dogs but luckily one was chained and the other was sleeping.

As I looked ahead I could see downtown, but it was so freakn far. I was tempted to sit at the bus stop and just wait, but I pumped myself up  to keep going. Every time I glanced at Downtown Nashville, there was this sense of hope  knowing that eventually I’d get there. Interesting thought, when you can see your destination and goal, this huge sense of hope rises inside of you. Doesn’t it? I was in a rough part of town but it didn’t matter because I could see the downtown buildings. My apartment is literally about 5 minutes from downtown. So I kept going…

Then another random thought came to my head. As I walked I realized and accepted the fact that this universe does not revolve around my life, my music, my blog, my anything! I was this random guy, walking 5 miles home, with only $2.52 in my pocket. Nobody stopped on the side of the road to ask if I needed a ride, if I was lost or maybe I needed a cold drink. People went on ahead with their lives. Reality set in and prospective took control.  I am but a grain in the sand and nothing mattered on this lonely road. So I started to appreciate everything I take for granted. I felt selfish for constantly asking for more, when I have so much to be thankful for. I thought of my wife and my boys the whole way there, and our future.

When the bus finally showed up, I decided to skip out on it and keep walking some more. The more I walked downtown began to get bigger. My destination was getting closer and closer. I don’t recommend walking in Converse for miles at a time though…My feet were killing me…My calves felt like Popeyes calves. My fingers were swollen and looked like sausage links. My body was drenched in sweat. My eyes needed wipers to keep the sweat out. So I stopped to buy a Gatorade at a gas station and get some sort of hydration. By this time I had walked 1.5 hrs. Ironically the total for my Gatorade was $2.50 leaving me 2 pennies. That Gatorade must have been the best drink I’ve had in my life… Sometimes when I drive home I see random dudes walking on the side of the roads and I say, “where the heck are they going?” They’re literally on the highway!!!” Today I was that random guy in the middle of the intersection. Today someone said, “who the heck is that dude walking in the middle of the road?” This walk really did a number on me. I really feel in my heart God spoke to me through everything my eyes saw and everything I felt. So what’s the moral of the story? There isn’t one…I walked 5 miles home from work, and it was the coolest time ever. I recommend it to all.

-fuser+

We moved to Nashville in December and  since then we’ve slowly grown to love this city. One of the top things on our list when we arrived to music city was to find a good, authentic, Mexican restaurant. At least to our taste buds, we never found that place. We searched, we researched and nothing caught our eye as the answer to our evening and weekend crave for Mexican food.

My wife and I were born and raised in Chicago which I consider the Mecca of all food. Name the country you feel like dining at and you can find a restaurant that will take you there.  Mexican food is Reina’s favorite food and even though she is Puerto Rican she gives my Momma a run for her cooking in the kitchen. So as you can expect, we went to Mexican restaurants in Chicago all the time. Let me rephrase that. We went to  Mexican joints in Chi town, ALL THE TIME. The best of the best are mom and pop joints with nothing fancy about their place, just amazing home cooked dishes.

Tonight everything has changed for us here in Nashville TN. Tonight we can finally say, OH MY GOODNESS…Amazing freakn tacos, 3 minutes from where we live. I was skeptical at first since we struck out so many times, but hidden in a East Nashville neighborhood was an amazing Mexican taco stop shop!  When I drove up to their parking lot there was no fancy sign, no valet parking, no flapping banners, just a hand written sign saying “MAS TACOS”. It felt like I was driving up to a roadside taqueria in Mexico, in the middle of nowhere.

Until a month ago, MAS TACOS was simply a 1974 Winnebago that drove thru town making tacos for all walks of life in Nashville. The only way to find out where they would be was to follow them on twitter.  Seems like word is getting around like wild fire, as it should be. They are  pretty rad.  So not only do they travel Retro style, they now have an open pit stop HERE! Since then I’ve been following them, waiting for the right moment where my soul longed for a taco and I would make my way to that exclusive part of town that night, to test the waters…That day came this evening. Instead of regular water, I had a fresh watermelon water. I ordered a chicken taco with the works and a pulled pork taco with the works. The sauce on these tacos blew up in your mouth with flavors of Mommas kitchen spices and the kick of spicy heat! Diego enjoyed a corn on the cob that I believe is grilled and slightly toasted. It had a distinct flavor, like nothing I’ve ever had.  It was incredible. My description of the tacos, the food and fresh drinks  do not give them justice. The menu is insanely awesome.

When you walk into Mas Tacos there is nothing glamorous about it, but a totally rustic and trendy place that was creatively restored.  They did a great job of recreating a road side taco stop in Mexico for sure. From the random art work on the walls, old faded wood, a vintage fan, to the un-matching chairs and tables.  If you peek into the kitchen you get a front row view of the chaos going on, with wooden crates full of Coca Colas from Mexico, fresh veggies all around, pots cooking, cooks sweating, your order being written on the paper plate it will be served in. One of the cooks looked like he played basketball for a 1970 team… A  young lady colored in beautiful art happened to sit at the table with my wife and boys to talk about MAS TACOS and how it started. She turned out to be the founder and owner. I never would’ve guessed it. She was super cool.  She is a Tennessee native, a chef who traveled through Latin America, worked in NY kitchens, only to return back home and do what she loves best. Glad you came back!!!

Not only do they make amazing tacos, but what an awesome story. You better believe we are going to be regulars at MAS TACOS. This place is a must!! Follow MAS TACOS and bring your friends. You are gonna dig this joint, I guarantee it.  You’re gonna wish you lived in East Nashville! Tonight’s menu was going to feature Cactus(nopales) with Chorizo. Soon they will be open for authentic breakfasts, including  Chilaquiles! Haven’t had that in a while.  There are a few things I would love to see on that menu and on the path MAS TACOS is going, I know I will see them being served very soon! What else can I say? We found what we’ve been looking for. I am already thinking of what I will have next time we dine in…“MAS TACOS POR FAVOR!!!”

Tell them “fuser’s blog” sent you!

-fuser+

I share my story and journey very often, through music, poetry, design, photos, conversations, film ideas, food and more. I never get tired of it, cause it’s constantly moving with new chapters and episodes. To be quite honest, it’s because it is all I know. I constantly read blogs, listen to music, watch films and search for all sorts of inspiration.  I wonder if I can ever be as good as them… The answer is no. I can only be me. I am not good with fancy words nor philosophical thoughts. Though, I am constantly impressed by those that pull it off well and are just brilliant by nature in doing so. Some people are just great!

It takes me a bit longer to learn stuff, but once I figure it out I hit the ground running. I’ve tried covering popular songs in the past, but I am just not that great of a musician to pull it off. I enjoy writing but it doesn’t reflect much in my grammar. (need a full time editor) I don’t read music nor can compose a classical piece, but can I start to write you an original melody and song that is  in my head, in  just  a few minutes.  I stay close to what I know, cause it’s my strength. Which I know isn’t always the greatest choice. I have to continue to push myself to grow as an artist. I have to work harder at it!  So I stick to creating from what’s inside and sharing my story. I ride my past,my  present and future story to the max. I find different ways to tell it. Different colors to paint it. Different melodies and words to sing it. It’s the most valuable thing on this God given journey. My story and I want to share it with YOU.

I challenge you to stop trying to find the perfect story outside your own. Stop pretending to be someone you are not.  Stop hiding behind what appears to be perfect when you know it is not. This world can see straight thru us. Tell your story! Keep it real, keep it true.  There is beauty in the imperfections. The impact of your story is far greater then what you think it can be. Your story can change the world. Your story might be the only “Jesus” people will ever hear and see on this earth. Your story is the greatest song ever written.  There is no greater way to fail and to succeed then as who God created…Which is YOU. So be kick ass, be YOU my friends!

How do you share your story?

-fuser+

This album cover visualy describes what goes on in my head...

It gets crazy inside my head sometimes. So much I wanna do, so much I love to do, so much I wanna keep doing, and so much I have to say no to. I am just not sure it’s all possible or not. I hate saying no, and maybe that’s a start for me. I am a story teller by nature, it’s in my Santoyo blood.  I love writing stories and memories from my childhood…. I love films. I have a few film ideas that I create per week. Some I write down, others drift off into the sunset on my drive back home. I love writing music, creating melodies and hooks. Sometimes I hear a full orchestra in my head with syncopated percussion and ambient sounds in the background. I love being on stage performing with my band!!! It’s a rush!!! As far as I can remember I always enjoyed the thought of being an actor.  I enjoy the challenge of  becoming a character and bring him to life for the camera.  It’s awesome!I love being in a production environment. There is this urgency in the air to create a masterpiece through shooting, editing and designing…

I am passionate about people. We love being in community, organizing community, leading community anything having to do with passionate people.  I love to talk and talk and talk and talk. I enjoy listening to people talk about their dreams and in return I enjoy encouraging them to share about how those dreams can become a reality. I love talking about Jesus…It’s a deep passion of mine. I am fascinated by his words, his life, his friends, his conversations and his parties. I love to entertain people through food. We’re always inviting strangers over for dinner…It’s just something we love to do…

A piece of my heart is in Cambodia. I’ve been quietly working on a huge arts movement that would impact 3rd world countries… Now do you see my dilemma? Yes I know…Focus on one thing. Focus on one thing. Focus on one thing…It’s easier said then done my friends… Can all this vital parts work together for something I am not seeing?

I was fortunate enough to sit with this totally rad dude who lives in Franklin TN… He’s a cultural architect, an artist, an entrepreneur, a painter, an author, a chef…this dude  rocks!  It was truly  an honor that he would take time to sit down for coffee  and talk with me… I was in desperate need of some creative advice and I sure got it! There has to be a core to my creative chaos and madness. It is all stemming from somewhere. The question is, what is that eye of the storm in my creative passion? How do I narrow it down and corner it! I need order…Big time!!! It’s something I am working on…

What are your thoughts and Insight? Anyone else suffering from Creativechaosthatneedsorder?

-fuser+

Creating culture begins at home. Every evening, me, Reina and the boys have dinner together. For Reina and myself this is new. It wasn’t common for us to have dinner with our families at one table and all together when we were growing up. I remember when my Mom cooked dinner, everyone ate at different times. Sometimes I ate dinner watching TV, ate dinner outside but it was rare to have everyone together at the table. Unless it was a family gathering or party.  When Reina and I got married, we wanted to start a new culture in our home. One being that we would eat together at one table with our kids.

So every evening  right before dinner, the TV goes off, we all set the table together, Diego prays for our meal and we dig in. We play music while we dine, we laugh and we watch Zion make a mess with his food. It’s amazing. It is something new for us, but normal culture for the boys. One day our boys will grow up with memories of dinner at the table together while the songs of Ruben Blades serenaded us. One day our boys will pass on this new culture to their children and share stories of their childhood.

I look back and remember many things from my childhood. Some are great memories and some are not so great. Regardless of it, it’s part of my past but doesn’t necessarily have to be part of my future. I can sit here and complain about how things could have  or should have been…But instead I choose to create a new culture in my home.  A new foundation. You can do the same. This can be the case for many areas of our lives. Don’t accept things for what they are…You have the power to create a new culture in you and those around you.

-fuser+

Back in the day, my water-park was the fire hydrant. It was the greatest time ever. The sidewalk gutter filled up with water and there we chilled all day long till either the sun came out, or the firefighters shut the hydrant off.  Back in the day I didn’t have swim shorts, I would take  a pair of sweat pants or jeans and cut them into shorts. Back in the day if you made it to the shower first, you had a full warm shower…the last person ran out of hot water half way thru. Back in the day ice cream(Popsicles)  came to you, a man would shout ” Paletas!!”, you’d run out and buy your fruit Popsicle right in front of your door step. Back in the day .50 cents bought you 50 pieces of gum or 50 water balloons. Back in the day, block parties were the best! Back in the day we played kick the can, hide and go seek ( bubble gum, bubble gum in the dish…”), football, catch one catch all, till late night on the block…we’d come home safe and sound! Back in the day, there was no need for an actual hot dog bun to enjoy it, any slice of regular bread would do. Back in the day, I couldn’t wait to own a pair of British knights. Back in the day, if we got thirsty outside there wasn’t a bottled water, just a water hose.  Back in the day, my birthday party entertainment consisted of my uncles singing and playing their acoustic guitars to old Mexican classics…until the beer started singing then we knew the party was ending.

Back in the day it was about going to the corner store to play arcades.  Double dragon, Ghost and Goblins, Kung Fu, Gunsmoke, Rampage, Contra, Mike Tysons punch out!.. Wow! I’m totally having flashbacks… Back in the day we waited in line just to play these arcades… Back in the day we were in a rush to grow up, sometimes I wish I could go back to them days, just for a little while! I have so many amazing memories from growing up in Pilsen. (a few popular words and phrases that I remember are… “that’s jive”,  “making out to a girl was referred to as, rapping to her”,  “I’m gonna clip you”, ” I gotta jet”,  “that’s bad!!!”-(actually meant something good)…

Do you have any Back in the day memories? or popular phrases?

-fuser+

Not sure who wrote this…but its interesting.

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank koolade made with sugar, but we weren’t overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING !

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day and we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD’s, no surround-sound or CD’s, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms…….

WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned

HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

-author unknown…

One of the many reasons I came to Nashville was to make music and write songs. I can’t really imagine my life not doing that, it’s encoded in my DNA…Whether it be professionally or not, it will be something I do till the day I die.  It’s been tough surviving here In Nashville so far… Landing a job has been a constant mission. With a Communications Degree and proven experience in the creative and broadcast world, it’s still challenging? Though I have landed random temp gigs and promising interviews, I am yet to land a solid and stable job. I’ve done a few acting gigs in town that have helped make ends meet, but as you know, in the world of entertainment  it takes time and lots of patience. Yeah times are tough, but it all comes with the package of the journey right? Nevertheless, writing music doesn’t stop, dreaming and planning doesn’t stop, our joy doesn’t stop.  It keeps going no matter what. Reina and I constantly remind each other, ” no matter what happens, we keep going”…I look at my two boys and the passion burns even more inside my heart to go for it. We are humbled by the constant support from our close friends and family! I am looking forward to taking a design class starting next week at Watkins,  courtesy of our friends…I have no words to express our gratitude!!! Sometimes other people believe in us, more then we do  ourselves… I have recieved random emails from people believing in us and in our journey…It’s awesome.  Reina returns to school this fall with a full ride! That is a HUGE blessing! Soon she’ll be designing homes for the world…  It’s awesome to see many things fall into place, while we work on getting the rest of the pieces together and finally make this city our home… So now what? Well it goes like this…1. I am finalizing some of the songs I have been writing for my solo EP, in preparation to hit the studio this fall with this amazing song writer/producer. I am super excited about it! This will be the first EP of a few in the making. With works in Spanish and some other cool stuff to follow…I won’t spill all the beans.  I will share this though, me and the fellas in TSP are taking off a weekend and heading to Atlanta for a writing session, stay tuned for updates and the scoop on that!

As far as the solo EP goes, this will be the first time that I venture into a music project as a solo artist without a band. The creative process will be an adventure in itself. This project is going to mean tons for me and my family.  It will reflect this journey we have taken, in pursuit of our passions. It will also be my  first project out of  Nashville, and a road towards becoming a better songwriter.   I am reaching out to all my faithful supporters to thank you and hope you guys will join me on this musical journey that has begun and will build up some momentum.  I have tons of music for you. Now the task is to get it recorded and out to your ears. We’re working on raising support for these projects and  many other creative endeavors.  We’re Looking for designers, film makers, photographers and more…If you want more info and feel you wanna be part of the creative chaos and help us with support and get this first of many rockets off the ground, please feel free to email me at jessesantoyo1@gmail.com. Thanks again.

Yours truly,

-fuser+ and the crew

“hasta la victoria siempre”

There is a war in me, between the corporate duties at hand and things my heart is on a creative rampage to achieve. Right now both are important, but one will prevail…

-f u s e r+

So here are a few of the pros and cons of relocating to a brand new city that we have experienced and are experiencing. Some say we’re crazy and honestly I agree… It just feels so right in our hearts. Erwin McManus said it best, “when we are passionate about God, we can trust our passions”.

(negatives)

We left everything and everyone we knew behind, so we didn’t have a whole lot of people in this town, or at least no immediate family. We had to learn our way around. Find the right place  and area to live in. Trying to plug into a brand new social pipeline, in our case the arts pipeline…music, design, film, etc… Finding jobs! Dang has it been tough! Finding the right schools, daycares, babysitters for our kids. Make friends. Make a life  in this town, from square one again. Finding Good pizza and Latin food. Finding things to do. Find a church we can call home.

(Positives)

Meeting new people, making great friends, meeting new families. It’s a new town. So we get lost very often, but in the process we discover great things in this town. Networking more then ever to collaborate with other artists, film makers/ talent agents, designers, Songwriters and more…Our communication and network tools have improved for both Reina and I. Jobs? it’s been tough, but we’ve had strong leads and opportunities are here, just need to be consistent on knocking doors and refining my resume and bio’s etc… Schools? they’re here and they sound great. One more year and Diego starts pre-k. Babysitters…Still working on that. Our dates consist of bring the boys along…Watching late movies=the boys sleep…we love this town and really wanna stay here and grow super old here…Once the jobs and school kick in, it will feel a little more secure. Good pizza? It’s not Chi town pizza but we’ve become huge fans of Pie in the Sky pizza. Latin food?…maybe we’ll open one…LOL. Church to call him. Check!

Overall the things that seem like negatives turn out to be positives. We’re growing in so many areas of our life. We’re growing closer as a family. We’re appreciating more and more the things that matter. Faith in God providing is our one and only vital sign keeping us alive. It’s an awesome journey that’s been worth it. In no way has it been easy, but it’s paying off in ways we never imagined. At the end of the day, no matter what happens, we’ve grown, we’ve learned, we’ve lived, we’ve taken the chance to pursue our dreams, and we’re diggn it. CONSISTENCY, INTEGRITY, PATIENCE…remedy for success. What may not make sense right now, will soon…Hebrews 11:6

-fuser and the crew”

“GREATNESS isn’t determined by fame,wealth,talent or education but by how much it takes to discourage you. Refuse to give up!”-Rick warren

It was 1979, my mother was working in a factory in Chicago. My parents came to this country in pursuit of a better future for their children as so many others in this country do.  Sometimes it may seem there is no plan in our lives and we’re part of this planet by chance. It feels like we are no more nor less then an insect. We merely exist for the sake of existing. But I truly believe  that isn’t the case.

So my mother tells me, at that moment and time she was  9 months pregnant. She was only weeks away from her due date.  My mom tells me that many great women as well as relatives worked at this factory to provide a better life for their children, but on that day, life would take a different turn for everyone.  My mom was working at this factory in order to help out my Dad with the bills and everyday necessities.  It just so happens that on this day, the factory would be raided by immigration. Many of her friends would be  arrested and deported, including other women from other countries she did not even know. My mother shares with me that  she patiently waited in a room to either be arrested, interrogated, or deportation. She admits being a little scared, especially being 9 months pregnant.  At the time my mother was still in process of finalizing her US citizenship, so all this made it so much more nerve recking.   All she knew was that she had to do whatever necessary to survive and provide the promise for her kids and her husband. It’s sad how this affects so many people all over the country today…We’ll leave that topic for another day.

The officer walked into the room and saw my mother. My mother recalls the woman looking at her,  she was dressed in her law enforcement attire. The woman looked at my mom’s belly, made eye contact with her and told her to leave and go home. My mother didn’t hide, runaway, nor retaliate. She grabbed her things  walked out the front door and went home. I can’t help to think  God must have had a plan for her, our family and  those women that were arrested and deported.  2 weeks later after the raid, I was born.  31 years later I am here, on a journey towards my destiny.  It’s real stories like this that give me so much hope. It’s stories like this that I enjoy sharing. It’s because of heroes like my my Mom and Dad  that had the courage to take a journey towards a better life that I am here. What maybe seemed as a misfortune at the time, has become a stepping stone into greatness.

From time to time I ask my mom the same question. Just to make sure I got it right… I ask my mom, what her job was at the factory back in 1979?  Her job was to  Sew the inside lining of Guitar cases…

-fuser+

misfortunes make giants